Hey! Everyone.Hope you are doing fine. Yes, I could have written GREAT but I mentioned fine because Great can be a short–term or a bit hard to manage thing but Fine is way easier.
In our day to day life, we meet or stay with a lot of people. They can be your friends, colleagues, family, relatives, customers, students etc. Some of them ask and some give advise. Somebody will judge you another can blame you or belittle you. Very few and close people are there to motivate you.
From all those who spread negativity or say bad words, you cannot avoid few or a larger group because of a number of reasons (career, Job, Relations, Respect, fear etc). I know you must be thinking that yes we cannot avoid and have to listen/bear but how to deal with it as we get stressed, irritated, insane, depressed, sad because of this. Let me tell you why and how to deal with these people/situation:
- It’s not you, It’s them: Yes, most of the time when people shower you with harsh words/ behavior, they themselves are struggling with some inner issue they aren’t capable to cope up. I am not saying that you should ignore everyone and live as you living but if unnecessarily someone is giving you pain don’t take them seriously because it’s not necessary that they are giving you advice or scolding you for your wrongdoing, its more likely they are digging in their own shit and unable to face their incompetence.
- Grab the Good: No matter who is the person, friend or enemy, saying sweetly or badly just Grab the good piece of advice/ suggestion/ idea from them and use it for your own good. Everything/Everyone can inspire you. It’s up to you whether you see the storm or the rain. So you don’t need to absorb all the conversation with them but just the good part which can help you to grow and make you calm/happy.
- Ignorance is better sometimes: We often listen to people, read it on social media /print media that we should face the problems but I guess not every battle is worth fighting for. Simply ignore if the matter is not too big/important. Just listen and ignore as if you don’t bother.
- Forgive: Yeah Yeah, I know we aren’t saints 😉 But actually forgiveness isn’t for them it’s for our own peace of mind. By forgiving others we give up on thinking of the same person or matter again and again and it makes us calm and is good for our sanity. I am not saying to forgive and be friendly with those people, just forgive and forget.
- Mind your own business: Don’t keep on thinking who is saying what. Just focus on your own health, own growth, own family, own career. In short Mind your own business. By concentrating on your personal growth, you must be less likely to think of others. Do your own work and think of YOU rather than others.
- Keep Calm: If someone is arguing, shouting just leave that place for a while and go in the fresh air and if it is not possible to go anywhere then just say OK to finish the same. Don’t argue or criticize because if you are doing the same, you will make them more energetic to fight further, As you know arguments feeds the fury. Saying okay doesn’t mean that they are right and you are wrong on the contrary it means you can not go down to their level.
All in all I want to say, not everyone advises you wrong or scold you for your bad. We do have family and close friends who did the same but for our good/benefit/growth.The point is, do not take criticism from everyone and punish your self and your sanity.
Be open-minded, Be calm!
Faith n Love